Lilly’s Blog

You know I’ve extolled the virtues of masturbation before. For example it can lead to a longer life.

And if you eat your own sperm, it’s nutritious also!

But how much fun is masturbating by yourself, really? Wouldn’t it be so much more exciting to have a sensuous naughty voice in your ear, telling you all sorts of taboo fantasies? Or maybe just teasing you, edging you and not letting you cum until you absolutely explode?

In honor of National Masturbation Month, I will send you a nice large FREE picture of ME rubbing my pussy. That’s right, your very own Hot Nasty MILF masturbating. All you have to do is purchase a 10 minute call with me through my direct dial line, or call me on Niteflirt and spend 10 minutes with me in one phone call. Be sure you ask for this hot hot picture of me if you do. I think you will want to masturbate a little more…

Ok well last time, dear readers, I talked about masturbation being the secret to long life…

Some of you may be conflicted by this because according to the Bible
(Genesis ch. 38 – go ahead and read it, it won’t kill you)
the sin of Onan is not masturbation, but spilling his seed on the ground, or wasting it.

And a tissue or your mom’s panties don’t count either.. Yep I know all about what you boys do when you’re allowed to run rampant.

AND as Monty Python says:

Every sperm is sacred..

Now I’m assuming that you don’t want 50 kids running around ragged and dirty, using up all your free masturbation and football-watching time..

So what are you to do?

Only one thing to do if you masturbate – CATCH YOUR CUM AND EAT IT. That’s right – it’s not wasting it if you eat it. Not only that, it’s low carb, low calorie, high in protein, contains epinephrine (a CNS stimulant) and an anti-depressant. So it’s really good for you!

So when you call me boys, have something to catch that cum with, like a little dribble glass and be ready to eat it for me.

Happy wanking =)

If masturbation is the secret to long life, both I and some of my callers should live a LONG time!

Yay for you, Ernest Borgnine!

Darlin’ you can call me any old day – I’ll even give you a Hot Nasty MILF discount